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Home & Garden Articles
Helping Elders With Home Improvement Projects - Money, Skills, Decisions, and Teamwork
Tue 30 Dec 2008 - 13:36
Helping Elders With Home Improvement Projects - Money, Skills, Decisions, and Teamwork
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Dr_Debi_Warner]Dr Debi Warner
Extended family can be of great help when facing bigger situations. And rebuilding the Home Team is just an excellent way to start the New Year. You can be part of her extended Home Team, and other relatives may join in too.
You can start by talking with your own partner and see what time and resources are available within your means. Then you can approach your Aunt's own children to see how your offer might fit in with their help plans. Then you can take the resulting help package to your Aunt to see how she likes the picture. Doing the talking stepwise first will build harmony in your extended Home Team and will also help keep things realistic.
So - Auntie may need cellar work, yard help, and roof situations fixed. Likely an older house has both necessary maintenance as well as a wish list of modernizations. You will want to start with the necessities and see what can be done first to make sure she is safe and warm for the winter. You can learn about wider priorities as you involve yourself and start a list of projects that could be tackled later that would maintain or improve the property.
In an extended Home Team, people may be reluctant to jump in out of fear. Fear of getting hurt, of spending too much money, of being depended upon. These can be dealt with by the Home Team by talking together about methods and plans.
An elderly person often has limited funds and many house needs. Many times the danger for novice DIY work must be balanced with available money for hiring a professional. What can you do if you are not competent to do the repairs safely yourself? There are plenty of options. You can carefully assess the situation and do preparation work so that the pro can have an easier shot at the project. You can also offer to help the pro or take up the low skill portions of the task like debris disposal or clearing the worksite.
You can also find someone on your Home Team to handle some of the different tasks of interacting with a pro. Perhaps one person can call to find available contractors and check their references. Another knowledgeable adult can do the interactions with the pro to set the terms and scope of the task. That one can follow through with all contractor communications and make sure things are finished within agreed upon terms. This can be a great help to an elder person who might not be current with the terms and technology in use today.
So what about the stuff you do want to tackle your self? I've got to emphasize that talking with the extended Home Team will build good will, while jumping into projects at your Aunt's without that step can cause turmoil in the family. So, how about a weeknight meal or coffee to go over the needs and possibilities? Some members may have money, others skill, and others neither. Well, everybody has something to offer, even if it is cookies and good will. All ingredients help the team move forward.
Some of the less handy folks can do preparation or hospitality work for the project. Vacuuming a cobweb filled cellar takes little skill, just determination and coveralls - ooh, especially the head. Getting literature for available materials from local suppliers, planning hospitality to feed a crew on work day - all are helpful and move the team along.
The knowledgeable team members may need a little pow-wow time themselves to plan the intricacies of the job. Providing the time, space and food for that meeting is a help. Taking notes for them, making calls, looking things up as they need it, can promote forward momentum.
Communicating with your Aunt is important, giving her choices and options, finding out about her budget, and assuring her that she need not feel guilty accepting help, since she has helped you all so many ways over the years.
You may end up having some tough conversations with either your Aunt or her children about what the future may bring for her life and her home situation. Since the real tough parts rest with them, you can still be of help in being understanding and gently realistic in your discussions. They will appreciate your supportive attitude now, and even later if they have to face awkward moves along the way.
You may get a call from your cousin to bounce ideas off you they are contemplating. Don't worry; they just want to hear your realistic and loving perspective. It will not be up to you to rescue, but to listen. That builds comfort for them and confidence in how they can handle things. The extended Home Team provides a comfortable light for the members to see loving and realistic solutions. Dr Debi says, "Enjoy your extended family and Happy Home Team!"
Dr Debi Warner is a Clinical Psychologist with a lifetime of home renovating in her toolbelt. Dr Warner invented RenovationPsychology® to help renovators. With three decades of family practice, Dr Debi saw many situations gone awry, so she focused her expertise on developing the skills and teamwork that will help people fully enjoy their home projects, for true home improvement. See more about how to harmonize your Home Team at http://www.RenovationPsychology.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr_Debi_Warner http://EzineArticles.com/?Helping-Elders-With-Home-Improvement-Projects---Money,-Skills,-Decisions,-and-Teamwork&id=1822218
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